Readers on why they love, loathe or miss visitors ‘dropping in’

Readers on why they love, loathe or miss visitors ‘dropping in’
  • PublishedJune 5, 2024

Do you love or loathe someone “dropping in”?

It was once a common way of staying in touch, but after we explored the etiquette of an unannounced visit, many of you wanted to weigh in. 

While opinions were divided, a couple of key themes emerged. Here’s what you had to say.

Some of you love it as a simple way to stay in touch 

Many of you welcome a drop-in and say it’s a key part of maintaining both community and friendships.

I’m from the bush and we expected everyone driving past to drop in for a cuppa. Our door is always open to anyone who wants to drop in. I find it weird that others don’t do this. It’s part of being a community. — Angus

I get more anxious knowing about a visit ahead of time. I love my many visitors and the best visits have been the unexpected. — Paula

Too much social etiquette actually stifles friendships. The best friendships are with those who don’t knock. The kettle goes on, the washing gets moved over, and the conversation is effortless.  Ronda

Real friends pop round when they know you aren’t at your best — to see if you are OK or need a hand or friendly ear — and I would offer the same.  Simon

Others loathe the idea of a drop-in and find it stressful 

Others see a drop-in as a stressful inconvenience, with some sharing that a heads-up could make things easier.

I find unannounced drop-ins so stressful. Most of the time my house is a mess, I’m in my worst clothes, I haven’t had time to check the basics (like a clean toilet and bathroom), there’s no snacks, and sometimes no milk for a cuppa.  Jess

You should never just drop in on someone, unless it is an emergency. Always message ahead and get a response to the message. Don’t use it as an excuse to then come over. Respect people’s privacy. They could be skinny-dipping in the pool.  Sam

Give me a five-minute warning. Amazing how much housework I can achieve in that time.  Felicity

For many, life is too busy 

For some people the idea isn’t theoretically repulsive, but it just wouldn’t fit into their day-to-day lives. 

I’m so busy trying to survive with work, study and kids that at home I just want to be alone and chill out, or I’m doing chores.  Beth

Who the hell in today’s world has time for people to just “drop in for a cuppa”? I get it was the done thing at one time and I remember it fondly. But, it just isn’t a thing in a world where everyone needs to work full time. — Matt

For those don’t like being caught off-guard…

Pro tip: Simply put your jacket on before answering the front door. If it’s someone you don’t want to see, you can say you are on your way out. In the unlikely event it’s someone you do want to see, you can simply say you have just arrived home  Louise


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